Flashback #23: Busy, Busy, Busy!!

Going slow and steady, but I will finish.

From August 4, 2011

Oh my goodness! Sister Valentine and I have been so busy this week! We feel truly blessed. It has been a week unique to any other on my mission. It starts with no GPS, so we are now reliant on the ancient art of maps. Then it goes to a ton of people we had at church on Sunday- ten nonmembers! We have had teaching appointment after scheduled member visit after teaching appointments all week! We have a few times double booked our days because Sister Valentine writes something in her planner to see someone and then I schedule something else... 

This week is one that I have never forgotten on my mission. It was at the time of so many miracles flowing out of Heaven! Overbooked teaching appointments, people just walking into church asking where to go, there was a baptism the following weekend... this is every missionary's dream! It was wonderful. I am so grateful that I had a companion that was diligent and obedient and taught me to work hard, because I learned right at the start of my mission that it was by those things that the blessings would come, and it is so true!

Being busy with positive things is one of the greatest feelings in the world. I knew that it would be so essential for me to maintain a positive attitude and busy schedule when I came home from my mission. I admit that is is so incredibly hard to not fall back into old habits, and I am sad to say that on a few occasions I have, but I am SO GRATEFUL for repentance, knowing that I can change anything in my life to become more like the Savior. It is such a joyful blessing to my life.

I miss being a busy missionary though. I was in contact with President McKee recently (I still love that man and his amazing family!!) and I told him that I want to add my testimony to the returned Elders and Sisters that have gone before me, that although life might seem easier outside of the full-time mission life, I would trade places with them in an instant. I miss the people that I love so much, I miss what I was able to do every day. Tonight I even thought to myself, "If I could just go to sleep tonight and wake up in Tennessee in the morning...."

My dear Tennessee and Kentucky friends, I miss y'all. I wish that I had more time to spend with you. There is so much more that I know I could learn from you. I'm grateful for the snippets of time that I did have.

Aside from that mushy stuff though, I do want to say that I am so blessed to have the life that I do now! And it is crazy. Just so that some of you might get a better idea of why I might not be in as close of contact as I would like, it's because Heaven has blessed me with this life:

Story for another time, I turned down the option to go to BYU. Big change in plans. Not expected. Heaven told me loud and clear that it's not time to go back yet. To this day, I am still thinking, "WHAT??!!" As a result of that, I needed to figure out what I WAS going to do with this time. My loving parents mentioned my predicament to my dear sweet grandparents who shared their experience when my aunt returned home from her mission. I suppose that there wasn't much opportunity for her at the time, so they lovingly loaded up her car and sent her to find a job and a place to live. I guess she just packed up and left, and landed in Provo, Utah, and found a great job, got accepted into BYU, and later met her husband and all that great stuff.

Well, wanna know what my parents helped me do next?

Loaded up my car, drove to a town in Utah that I had never been to before to live with a dear sweet sister that I barely knew (my two sisters do know her well) who offered to let me stay for as long or short as I like and has a spare room for me to rent. She has been my angel in more ways than one. I couldn't ask for a better roommate. I'm grateful that I at least had that to go on.

Next few weeks was job hunting. I had some GREAT leads. Unfortunately, and surprisingly, I didn't feel right on the first few offers that I had. Finally I was to the point where I was in need of a paycheck, and I got a call back from one place a friend told me to apply- Good Earth Natural Foods. I love that job. I also went in and took a job at Five Guys because I worked there before my mission and knew I could get hired on easily. People tell me that my two jobs are conflicting. That may be true, but they're not conflicting to my bank account.

In the middle of all of this, I was attending a singles ward where I didn't know a single soul. I think that one of the most surprising things to happen in my life occurred when I was called and sustained to be in one of the the Relief Society presidencies (there are two) of that singles ward. I knew the RS president and maybe one other girl I could call by name, and the bishop who was actually released to fulfill a stake calling that day. I guess God knows best. Strike that. I KNOW God knows best. Still trying to figure out His sneaky plan for me though.

Also, the first Sunday I attended was coincidentally ward conference. The stake leaders were there and brought a stack of applications for us young'uns to work in the temple. I knew that this would be a great way to keep the temple in my life a priority, so I took one. A couple of weeks later, I was interviewed, and a month later, I began my shifts as an ordinance worker. It's quite the daunting task, but I love it. If you hold a current temple recommend, and the thought just came to you that you could work in the temple, DO IT. At lease meet with your bishop about it. You will be amazed at the blessings that will come.

And on top of that, I am dating like crazy, and I'm having a party with it. I average one date a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I've lost count on how many different guys... I'm enjoying it while I can because I don't know how long it will last.

So, between two jobs, relief society meetings, working in the temple, dating, and trying to keep my life somewhat organized... My book is full. I usually work four days a week 8am-11pm with an hour break between the two jobs, and on the days I don't work at both places, I am at the temple, in a RS meeting, or squeezing in some time for a date. Sundays are amazing. I get to sleep in. Meetings start at 1 and then my night is full with family and friends and church firesides. I live for Sundays.

I love it that way.

So, just a shout out to my friends, no matter where you are: I have not forgotten you. I pray for you, and I hope you are doing well, and that we can talk soon :)

The other purpose is to say that I know that filling life with the most important things makes most of the difficult or seemingly impossible things easy.

Say "yes" to doing something good that you didn't think you had time for.

I love you all!
Sister Kimberlee Franson

Flashback #26: Ch-Ch-Changes

Let me tell you friends, I love my mission, and my mission is not easy. You've probably heard me say that before, and you've probably heard a lot of other missionaries and returned missionaries say that before. It is the greatest thing ever. 

I've gotta admit, my mind has been on overload lately. I am going home next week. Monday night I felt a lot like this: 

Post from last fall 2011

I confess, I had a hard moment yesterday. As a missionary, you have a lot to remember, and I also had a lot on my mind, and then I was told something I didn't really want to hear.

I was frustrated. One of my favorite talks came to my mind about a currant bush. I was very much feeling like the currant bush, and I was sympathizing probably a little too much. Sometimes when we face a trial, we feel beaten down, neglected, like we're being punished, like we are worthless, but that's not true in the eyes of the Lord. 

I really felt miserable! With my mind going everywhere I also ran into the problem of not having a filter when I would say stuff. I really made myself look really silly, especially at dinner time. I went home that night asking myself, "What is wrong with me? Why can't I pull it together? Why can't I clear my mind?"

I still don't have the answers to everything. I sure as heck pretend like I do sometimes! Confidence can go a long way! That may be a slight character flaw of Sister Franson. I think that God doesn't give me all the answers to keep my humble. Strike that. I know that's why God doesn't give me all the answers. I still woke up this morning and I took some extra time to pray to ask Heavenly Father to help me clear my mind and to apologize and ask for forgiveness for my pride and personal flaws. I just really want to be a good missionary! It is a constant battle.

I then began pondering and quickly became so grateful for repentance and forgiveness, just the simple ability to move on. To me, that is the great message of the gospel- that we can CHANGE and one day we will changed ultimately to be perfected through Christ forever. (See Enos 1:27)

That's the great hope of the gospel to me. I am constantly messing up, constantly making myself look crazy, and constantly needing to repent. So, for my last week, I am still focusing on trying to change. I know that because of my Savior, Jesus Christ, that I can change and that it is never too late. 

"Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God." Moroni 10:32

These are the last words from the great prophet Moroni in the Book of Mormon. I know that these are wise words to live by. So, my dear friends, I extend to you that same invitation: Change your life today. Come closer to Christ. Rid yourself of your burdens and your sins and your sorrows. He can help you to change. He will help each of us to one day be perfected and live with Him again. 

I sincerely hope that you all have an action-packed day!

Love, Sister Franson

Flashback #23: Learning to Face Reality

This was from way way back towards the beginning....
 
A few days ago I asked what it means to be blessed. When it get's right down to it, a blessing is 'something good.'

Well friends, now I have come to see how a blessing is so much more than simply a good thing. It truly is a gift from God. I know that my mission has been one of the greatest blessings I have ever been given in this life.

I have a dear friend of mine- actually my very first mission companion from the days of the Missionary Training Center- who asked if all of us sisters who came to Tennessee together at the same time could write a post about our experiences and what we've learned.

Well... she just HAD to remind me.

I've kind of been in denial in some ways. I have so many mixed feelings about going home. Regarding what I could post, I have thought about it, and thought about it, and thought about it. I think that even if I wrote the most elaborate, tear-jerking, emotional post, it really wouldn't do justice to my whole experience as a missionary.

Over this process and pondering, I have come up with a small handful of gems:

There are some things in life that cannot be gained in any other way but by experience. I can testify that a mission is one of those things! Gaining a testimony and spiritual knowledge of the Jesus Christ and His gospel is another. I am told that motherhood is another one, and I know there are many other examples. If you have the opportunity to go on a mission, I can promise you that serving a mission will bless and positively influence every other major life event you will encounter. Ask the Lord, and you will have your personal witness testify to you of the importance of your call to serve.

People are real. This might come as a shocker to some. I have been able to see real people, living real lives, overcoming real challenges. Having a companion 24/7 has also taught me a lot about myself and how I build relationships with others, and I am so grateful that I have learned how I can build and strengthen relationships with friends, family, and others for the rest of my life. This principle has also taught me much about Jesus Christ and how real He is, and how He thinks about us. Think about what you are doing right now, or what you will be doing ten minutes from now. How would Jesus Christ do it? How would the home of the Savior look? How would He feel if he saw what you have done so far with your day and with your dealings with others? The Savior is more than just a man who died for our sins. He knows each of us, and He knows us well. So does our Heavenly Father.

The Gospel is TRUE. I have also come to know what it means to be true. I have heard many philosophical comments and I have read many talks and listened to sermons that say truth is subjective and relative. I am here to testify that truth is NOT subjective, nor is it relative. There is indeed perspective in this world, but actual events and reality cannot be altered. I don't know if many Christians realize what they are saying when they casually say that the church is true. I can't even do it justice to describe what it means. I suppose that the adjective that I go to most is real. God is real, He is tangible, Joseph Smith really did see Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ in 1820. The Book of Mormon is an actual account about a real ancient American civilization. Faith is an actual principle given to us by God. Repentance works, baptism is essential and powerful for the remission of our sins, the Holy Ghost does in reality communicate and protect us, and once a man or woman knows this, the gospel cannot be forsaken, neither should spiritual progression be stopped. That is not the plan of God. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints truly is God's church and has the authority therin.

There is always a choice. I love to change. I can also testify that change can be difficult. It can require the difficult challenge to humble one's self before God and sometimes our fellow brothers and sisters. Try to change though! If you are upset, just smile. Try to sincerely smile. President McKee has often said that we can change our attitude as easily as we can change what we wear. I KNOW that we cannot always control what happens to us, but we can control how we react to what happens to us, and when we do that in a manner pleasing to God, then we are on the path to mastering and overcoming the natural man.

Only the Savior knows how we feel. This kind of ties back in with the first point. I have come to... strongly dislike the phrase, "I know exactly how you feel." No one does. Our lives and personalities are so unique that no one can possibly know but God. There are some that may be able to empathize or relate, but it is not possible to know exactly how someone else feels. Instead, I have learned that the best way to handle a delicate personal situation is to just say to the person, "I can understand why you feel that way" or "I have felt similar (not to be confused with exact) feelings like that before" and then you can bridge that situation to the gospel. This default in life is part of God's plan. We need to turn to the Savior and no one else to feel completely consoled and light from our burdens. Time is also an essential part of God's plan. If we could go back in time or remember things perfectly, we would learn much less and rely on the Savior very little.

I have learned so many other things. My understanding and knowledge of Christ's church and His gospel has expanded in a way I couldn't have predicted or understood a year and a half ago. I understand better the why of the gospel and how I want to exercise and use each principle in my life and with my family. I have also learned how I can have greater faith, and I have learned the importance of waiting... a lot.

So, dear friends, this post isn't goodbye. Yet. I still have a small handful of weeks. As a dear friend of mine reminded me, although my service as a full-time missionary is coming to an end, I am not going back to my old life, but I am looking forward to a new life with many wonderful opportunities, and many more blessings to look forward to and be grateful for.

Dear friends, the church is true. I can promise you that. I hope that you will take the time to find out for yourselves.

I pray that each of you will have an action-packed, blessed day!
Love, Sister Franson

Flashback #21: Expectations and Rule Box

Ok friends. This is turning out to be quite a longer adventure than I thought. I really need to buckle down and "DO IT!" as President Kimball would say. So I WILL finish this.

I just read over this post and it was from last year, almost exactly a year ago. This one was a real challenge for me. I have found that one of my greatest weaknesses comes through my expectations.

I expect to wake up in the morning in my bed and not somewhere else. I expect that the phone will work every time that I use it. I expect that many people are reasonable and kind.

Well, sometimes my expectations don't exactly go as planned... I'd be surprised if I'm the only one this happened to. So I have since learned how to adjust my expectations when they don't happen. Let me tell you, it's great. And it's hard. One time that it wasn't so great, is right here:

Here's a little note about Sister Franson:

 As a missionary, I feel super analytical about gospel principles. The gospel of Jesus Christ is very logical and reasonable to me, even when it comes to understanding the more emotional aspects of it, like recognizing and understanding the Spirit. I can at times be very left-brained as they say. It's all a matter of following instructions and staying within the "Rule Box." And there are different levels of the Rule Box as dictated by the Spirit. The Spirit is the key to opening and selecting from the Rule Box.

One thing I love about my Rule Box is the area labeled "Absolutes." My Absolutes contains eternal doctrines and principles that will never change, such as Jesus Christ is the Savior and Redeemer of the world. The true and standard words of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are Bible, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, and Pearl of Great Price. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the only true and complete gospel on the earth. And, stemming from the latter statement, all handbooks stamped with the Church logo and statements approved by the General Authorities and especially the First Presidency are added to the Absolute portion of the Rule Box.

So, this last weekend Something messed seriously with my Rule Box.

DDDAAAA!!!!!! "My brain is crazy," as one of my newest friends would say. And I want my rule box placed back in order. In fact, I want to share my knowledge and comprehension of certain principles from my Rule Box to fix the Something that shook the Rule Box. But as I am filing through the Box and placing ideas and items in their place, I find no rule, solution, or best option that can resolve the mayhem in my mind.

So, what's a Sister Missionary to do?

With the help of others who aided in the project of recompiling my Rule Box, I found the answer:

"Let it go."

NO!! I can NOT let it go! The something violated the Absolute section of the Rule Box! Life must be placed in order.

A petty life lesson, isn't it? I mean, the answer is simple and placed right in front of my face, but I don't want to do it. In fact, I feel as if I can't do it at all. I refuse. Yes, I recognize that my pride is in the way, but I am not doing anything wrong besides that. I'll just repent when I feel that I can. I have done nothing wrong. In fact, it was the Something that broke the rules from my Rule Box. Shouldn't I figure out a way to tactfully and nicely fix the Something? It's practically my responsibility! I know what's wrong with it!

But.

That is not how the Savior loves.

Sometimes... the natural man in me feels very small when the Spirit speaks.

So, I'm going to let it go.

Am I entirely happy about it? Not yet. But I will be! Soon I hope, too. What am I learning about this experience? Patience.

And patience I... am still learning!

Have an action-packed day!
Love, Sister Franson

Flashback #18: One of my Favorite Things

October 29, 2011. Almost a year ago. I can hardly believe it!

And now, to you, my few but still much appreciated and blessed faithful blog readers. I am going to ask you to do something hard. Make it purposefully hard, not so you can have the same experience that I did, but so you can see how the Savior can cater your experience for you.

Think of something you want to change about yourself. You get to choose. Be sure that it is measurable and attainable otherwise it may not work. And why do you want to change it? I don't know- it's yours. The Lord knows though. Make it a team project between you and Him.

I do love repentance! I think it is easy to forget that repentance and the atonement is not only to wash away sin, but to become a better Christlike person, and for that matter, help us to achieve anything that is good! I love it! I have had goals on my mission that I have set, and I have prayed for. I know it is because of Christ that they have happened. One of my goals was to strive to be a more outwardly happy person. I still am trying to work on that, but I had a friend last week that said to me, "You always look so happy!" And it means a lot to me because it's something I want to improve. Maybe you have a goal to eat more healthy or read your scriptures more often or give up an old bad habit- that's hard! Christ will help. If you truly believe that, put it to the test. Pay the price, put in the time. There is no better time to start than now! The sooner you feel the power of the atonement, the sooner you can feel that burden lifted.

Have an action-packed day!
Love, Sister Franson

Flashback #17: A Blurb With Perspective

From Gallatin, again, last year. If I remember this correctly, it was at the end of October, possibly the beginning of November.  

I GOT A PACKAGE TODAY!! Yes indeedy, I got a package. 

This week... has been one of the most challenging weeks of my entire mission up to this point. I've had some really tough moments before, but this week it has been spread out gradually day after day. People just aren't home for some reason. We had one of the ward members who was so sweet to drive us around for two nights in a row, and we visited house after house, knocked on door after door, and Sister Anderson and I are to the point where we are trying to find people who have been taught over a year ago to try again just so we can have someone to teach. Want to know how many lessons we have taught this week so far to a non-member? One. And the member that we brought with us got along so well with that non member that they did most of the talking to each other. And that is GREAT! We love it when members come out with us! But this week that has been it. The only people who have let us into their homes this week besides that are members, active and less active. People have cancelled and not shown up to appointments. Yesterday we couldn't get a ride to meet one of our appointments, so we had two choices: walk or ride our bikes. We figured it would take us an hour to walk so we decided to ride our bikes. Up and down hill after hill we went, fixing broken chains and waiting at stop lights along the way until we finally got to the church where we were meeting our appointment. Annndd.... no one was there. We rested for a little while, tried to call, and then headed right back.
   Today has been pretty much the same. We walked to a christian thrift store that we volunteer at every week putting clothes away, hanging them on hangers, organizing, and whatever else they need us to do. It's something that I sincerely look forward to every week because I know that they can use the help. After that

I actually remember this experience all on its own without the blog's reminder. I remember it fairly vividly, actually. The day that Sister Anderson and I rode our bikes, we were late getting back to the apartment to have Sister V. from the ward pick us up from dinner, and we rode right through a cloud of gnats and I remember spitting and sputtering and finding bugs in my mouth. Sounds great, doesn't it? And even though plans were falling through and Sister A. and I were having a few bad days, we bonded closer together, and we even took a time out and treated ourselves to white chocolate bread pudding at La Riviere's, which I've been informed has sadly closed since then.

 I started this post saying that I got a package! I mean, who doesn't love getting packages from home with goodies and treats from Mom? I think that all too often we are so quick to count our crisis and not our blessings. I admit, it is hard to for me sometimes! Then I try it. I don't ignore or discount the negative, but I learn how to combat it with the positive! Doesn't the Lord always come through in the end anyway? I was once given a piece of perspective early on in my mission:

And it's all made possible by the Atonement of Jesus Christ. 

I could go on and on about this topic. If you want more, read this. It's quite possibly my most favorite conference talk ever given. Plus I was sitting in the audience when it was delivered. It's powerful.

Have an action-packed, blessed day!
Love, Sister Franson



 

Flashback #16: With a CHALLENGE!

From... last Fall... obviously, when I was in Gallatin. 


It's time for FALL!!!

And that's all I said! Plus this nice picture. This year, as I am looking outside, seeing the leaves fall, the weather cooling down, Halloween and other Fall decorations going up, I think to myself, "NOOO!!!!!!"

Partly because I love summer time. I REALLY love summer time. This year though, Fall means something else:

It means that I am going home soon.

Yep! Home. Back to Idaho. I am really sad to know that I am leaving soon. I am trying hard not to think about it, but it is VERY hard not to. Last week, I did something that I have never done before.

I counted the number of days until I go home.

I DID! I can't believe I did that! And do you know what I found out? I have less than 100 days before I am on an airplane home! Yikes! So, instead of this number making me homesick and want time to pass by faster until I go, I did something special with this number. The number was 82. (I can't tell you how many days from today and I don't want to figure it out!). I have 82 specific things that I need to do before I go home. I won't tell you what it is (yet), but many of you may figure it out, I hope!

I think I can do it! But you know something? I can't do it alone. Most importantly, of course, I have the Savior. I am praying that he will help me with this goal. I also have a wonderful, obedient, and supportive companion that is willing to help me to accomplish this goal. There are also great, strong members of the congregation we work with that support us and give us so much help! I couldn't do it without them! And of course, there are many other dear friends and supporters for the missionaries. You are so important. We pray for you every day.

So, dear friends, do you want to be part of this miracle that is about to take place? Here is what you can do to help:

Invite the missionaries over to your home.

That's all you need to do! No matter where you are or who you are, invite the missionaries to their home and listen to what they have to share with you. WILL YOU DO THAT? When you do, tell me about it.

"By small and simple things are great things brought to pass." Alma 37:6

The best way to make the day action-packed is to invite the missionaries over! :D
Love, Sister Franson

Flashback #14: From My Personal Study...

October 5, 2011

I have been trying more diligently to read something from the Book of Mormon every day as a missionary. In the  recent weeks I have been falling short because I have been studying from the Old Testament, but especially after the council received in General Conference, I will repent and continue to study from its pages each day.

 This picture was taken about 3 weeks ago downtown

.

This morning I was reading in the book of Alma when he is giving council to his sons in the chapter where he tells the story of his miraculous conversion, when he was "in the gall of bitterness" and then his "soul was filled with joy" (36:18,20). If you go just a little bit farther, I read more of his words and powerful testimony to his son Helaman.

    "And I have been supported under trials and troubles of every kind, yea, and in all manner of afflictions; yea, and God has delivered me from prison, and from bonds, and from death; yea, and I do put my trust in him, and he will still deliver me.
    "And I know that he will raise me up at the last day, to dwell with him in glory; yea, and I will praise him forever" (36:27-28)

   I just thought that was beautifully said. Putting ALL your trust in the Lord is hard, but dear friends, where is our faith? Have not the prophets and apostles testified to us time and time again that those who do put their trust in God and follow his commandments with all the energy and capacity that we have, that we will be blessed? 

Yikes. I think that one lesson I have learned is how truly difficult that could be. Well, at least for me it has been. I suppose it's possible that everyone else in the world has perfect trust in the Lord except me. But not likely.

I think it's important to remember that the promise is that we will be blessed. I do know that is true! I also think it's important to remember that we may not be blessed the way we want to be. Think of Abraham- do you think he was a blessed man? The Lord promised to bless him with posterity beyond the sands of the sea. Did Abraham have trials? Um, yes. His is one of the most famous trials of all- being asked of God to sacrifice his son Isaac. What about the Book of Mormon? Amulek. I love that man. He is my Book of Mormon hero, by the way. He was SURELY blessed. I mean, he had a prophet for a mission companion! He was also a successful man, and leaving behind the things of the world, he went to preach the gospel. And oh man, there were trials.

Dear friends, rarely will our lives be filled with black and white trials and blessing times. They will be mixed together. The Lord's promises still stand true, that through our trials he will bless us, and in many times the trials will become strengths. So trust Him. It will happen.

Have you counted your blessings today? I hope so.

Have an action-packed day!
Sister Franson